Sunday School Chronicles: My animated words.

You can run but you cannot hide. A saying that cannot be any truer. Problems do not just "go away". You can block them out, ignore them and do your very best to act like they don't exist, but the truth is, they don't go away. They will always be there, until you face them head on. December, I had to face something I have been running from, for two years. 

If you've been following the Sunday School Chronicles section of my blog, you'll know that I shared the very beginnings of how I got involved with kids ministry, which I will pick back up in the next Sunday School Chronicles post. This particular post seemed fitting for what I'm going to share. This is coming from my heart. When you're doing something you love, you ignore the amount of hours, dedication, sacrifice and commitment you invest into it. You're enjoying it. That's all that matters. This was the case for four years, with me in kids ministry. Nothing else mattered. I would devote hours upon hours, with projects and activities. I would create countless things to do. I can remember spending entire paychecks on supplies, curriculum, music and many other things for the Sunday School department. If you asked me, this was not a sacrifice to me. It was my passion and I had no problem or reservation in investing into it. It was also my heartbeat and unfortunately the enemy knew this. During this four year span, I would write a lot of our curriculum, as well as puppet scripts, dramas, musicals, etc. I remember in school, my teachers would tell my parents, "She needs to pursue something in writing. There's a talent there.". As I was writing our curriculum, among other things, my dad told me, "Charity, your gift is in writing and children's ministry. God gave you this talent. Don't ignore it.". Unfortunately, I did ignore it. Fortunately, God's a jealous God.

Two years ago, I started my business, Dainty Button. I never knew it would take off like it did or be as successful as it has been. It's been a great blessing in my life, but a distraction. I was tired. I had poured my heart into our kids ministry for four years and I was spent. My energy was gone and I was tired. I was looking for something different and look what popped up. Something to zap up the hours and minutes of my life and take my focus from what I know I was supposed to be doing. For the past two years I've seen something I've worked so hard at and invest so much into suffer, which is Graceland Kidz and children's ministry. My heart was somewhere else, entirely. I look back and it breaks my heart. I ask myself, "How could I have let this happen? How could four years of investment just mean nothing?". I have struggled so much with resentment in myself and even my business, for allowing this to effect something so beautiful and wonderful in my life, that was birthed from a deep burden. A year ago someone very impressionable upon my life, spoke something to me. I knew what they meant but I stubbornly blocked it out of my mind. Little did I know that a year later, that sacrifice would come very easily, for me. At that time in my life, it would've been a great sacrifice. The past two years I feel like I have ran a marathon. Running, running, running. And in December I could run, no more. You can't outrun God. You just can't. You can try with every ounce of energy you can muster up, but it's impossible. 

In November, the pastoral staff asked if the kids ministry was doing anything special for the Christmas program. I thought we could do a couple songs and read the Christmas story. It would be cute and simple. The Sunday school staff and parents were very persuasive in changing my mind. Two years ago, our kids ministry performed a Christmas musical, in which I wrote. It was the first musical I had ever written and it was a huge hit. Ironically, a month later I started my business. The church and staff remembered that and thought it would be nice to do something again. I cringed, inside. I did not want to do this. It was too much work and it was the holiday season, in which I was extremely busy. I remember telling God, "If it's meant to do a large program and I'm supposed to write it, then I need a sign.". Two nights later, I was woken up out of a dead sleep at 4 in the morning, with my mind racing. I knew that feeling and voice. I sat straight up out of bed, grabbed a pad of paper and pen and started writing. And writing. I wrote until the sun came up, tears streaming down my face. It was the first time I had written anything in two years. It was at that moment that I knew I had to quit running and face the music. This was my calling. Impacting children with my words. In December, I decided to return to school, finishing my degree, which is now journalism and use Dainty Button as a means to get myself through college.

There have been countless times that people have said, "Charity, you need to write a children's book.". Easier said than done. I remember, as a child, dreaming of writing a children's book. As I got older, the thought was not far from my mind, but I never really pursued or entertained it much. I have the tendency of sharing great plans and ideas with friends and family and not because I'm a liar, but life happens and those plans, sometimes get forgotten. In early January, as I sat with my parents sharing with them that I think I wanted to really pursue writing a children's book, I decided I would keep this to myself, until the time was right. I've had years of ideas for a book. My mind is an interesting place. Ha! Even though I have many ideas, for the past month, I've been diving into children's books, Disney and animated movies, Adventures in Odyssey, etc., getting inspiration, brainstorming and gathering more ideas. I've also prayed consistently about this. Once, I knew God had given me direction and a plan, I started looking for an illustrator. And guess what? I found one. I met with him, this afternoon. I delivered the story plot, as well as ideas of where I wanted this to go and we have officially begun the creative, illustrating and writing process of my first children's book, which will technically not be a "book" in the traditional format, but an action packed series of animated comic books, which will be mainstream Christian, focusing on real life situations that children face, while building character. We're hoping for it to hit the publisher this Spring. I'm unbelievably excited about this new chapter in my life, in which just like many other things, I will share this adventure with you, through my blog.

God's mercy and grace overwhelm me, at times. Two years of this little "detour" in my life, has taught me one thing. Mercy. No, two things. Don't be stupid and try and do things your way. His mercy far exceeds anything I can comprehend or fathom. I will never understand why He never gives up on us, but I'm so glad He doesn't. I can't imagine a world, with no mercy. I pray the words that fall on paper will show my gratitude.

Charity